The walls feel like they are closing in on me. I was awoken again this morning by the loud neighbour upstairs. Six o'clock! What is he doing at six o'clock in the morning that it requires banging!? Arghhhh! This is such a frustrating situation because we all know that an eye for an eye will just start a war. This guy lives on the top floor so HE doesn't have anyone living above him making noise at all. So he NEVER has to put up with noise from anyone. Everyone below him - DOES. I used to think he just didn't realize how loud he was being not having to hear it himself living on the top floor. But then he made two rude gestures into my doorbell camera awhile back (flipped the bird,...) so that tells me he was saying "I know I am annoying you and it's fun and I'm not going to stop" He laughed in the camera. So you can't fight that. He just wants a fight. So instead I have to ignore it the best I can. But when you are woken up out of a deep sleep because someone is PURPOSELY banging just to annoy you ~ it's hard to think kind thoughts about this person. He has really effected my sleep. In my life,... sleep is a blessed escape from the misery. So I try and get as much of it as I can. But as you age you seem to need less sleep and lately I average about 4 to 5 hours a night. The problem seems to be I can't usually fall asleep until two or three in the morning. So you can imagine how frustrated I get to be woken up to banging at six o'clock. Because once I'm up - I'm up. I can't fall back to sleep. So here I am, Saturday morning up at six o'clock! I have tried talking to him,... I have tried talking to his caregivers,... I have tried everything I feel I can. But this man ENJOYS the "game" as he knows how much it irritates me. He laughs when I get irritated,... how do you fight that? The only thing I can do is ignore it. But damn,... I just want a full nights sleep without stomp, stomp, scrape waking me up,... Just ONE NIGHT.

But the good news is it's game day and I had to be up fairly early anyway as Manchester play at 7:30am. So I have my coffee and I am trying to calm down from being so rudely woken up. My anxiety is so high,... I wish I could just let things go but noise really irritates me. Especially when you know it's not accidental but on purpose. I hate this building. As I type this he is stomping around above me,.... *** sigh *** probobly smiling because he knows he can and theres nothing anyone can do to stop him. 

But I am going to put a line under it. I will just turn the volumn up on the game and drown him out.

Ok,... I am conscously taking a deep breath and slowly exhaling,... phew,....  calming right down. Expelling the bullshit and inhaling the calm,... Now,... that I have purged it out I can now sit quietly and enjoy my coffee and the game.