One more pay and I'm out of this province

I don't understand why I am invisable. I don't understand why I don't fit in. I don't fit into the Morgans,... I don't fit into the Holyoaks,... I don't fit in ANYWHERE. 

I don't understand.

I just want to die because there is no place for me on this planet and I am so alone

I have nothing but a woman who wants me evicted and is stopping at nothing to have that happen. 

There are only 2 people on this planet that know I exist right now. My friend Becky, and a woman who seems to have made it her goal in life to destroy me.

There is nothing GOOD ~ just the threat of eviction,..... 

I can't live like this,.... I can't live not knowing if I will have a home in months time. THAT is just proving too stressful for me right now.

I left emails with my lawyers legal aid (because apparently I am not good enough to actually rate a phone call from him) and as usual  *** crickets *** no answer. I literally wrote I am at the end and if I dont' get help sson I will be ending my life,...

*** crickets *****

I am just a drama queen to this world and I am never going to be seen or heard.

I am invisable

I almost have enough to book a flight to Vancounver. I have the hotel I want to stay in and now I just need the money. One more pay,... and I will have enough to get the fuck away from this place where I am nothing but the foder to a gossipy little cunt who for some reason I don't know about - hates me so much she is actively trying to make me homeless. And when i reached out to housing for help,... I got reprimanded for vaping in my unit and yet again,..... THREATENED WITH EVICTION.

I can't live like this,... noone can,... never knowing if you will have a home,.... or food,.... or the basic needs of life,.... benefits and charities is all I am about.

I have had enough and i am counting down the days to get the hell away from this building and Tonya Halls and her witch hunt. To get away from Ontario Housing who LOVES to threaten people with eviction just because,....

I have been asking for help but there isn't any out there that POOR people can access. Only the rich get help in this world. 

So many people have read this blog and noone has reached out. I feel like a grain of sand on a beach. Tiny,... miniscule,.... just one of billions,... so small and insignificant.

My heart aches everyday. The feeling of knowing you are not wanted runs so deep. It hits your soul and it leaves you broken.

All I wanted was help from the gossip and her witchhunt and not to have the threat of homelessness always hanging over my head. THIS IS NO WAY TO LIVE

One more pay and i am out of this fucking building,... this fucking city,... and this fucking province and I am not coming back. I will find my dead mother and pay my respects and then I am off to Hastings street for a huge hotshot of fentanyl.

My life is so fucking miserable that I am counting down the days until I can finally die!

And when I do,.... it will be how I came into this world. UNWANTED, UNLOVED and noone will even care that I'm gone,....