It's Sunday morning which means "Skote Outdoors". I happened upon this Youtube channel quite some time ago and found that I really enjoy watching this couple live off grid in Newfoundland. They have built this homestead from scratch. Just a nice couple enjoying life in nature. I look forward to their videos every week. I wish I had the physical attributes to do this myself but after being homeless I have discovered that I really do like my bed and hot running water. I guess 'off-grid' isn't for me. But I love the rest of the lifestyle.
I was planning on going to Church this morning but have realized I can't as I have ordered a microwave from Amazon and the delivery is today. I have to be home as I have to give them a "one time password" which is suppose to be emailed to me this morning but so far I haven't received. After the BestBuy tv fiascol this has me a bit anxious. No password = no delivery. So I am crossing my fingers that email comes and I don't stuck with no password when the delivery arrives. I am a bit anxious about all things I have delivered now. But without a car or someone to drive me around, delivery is the only way I can buy things. Even groceries in the winter when i can't walk because of the snow. But if all goes well, I will finally have a microwave!
I'm a bit worried about money right now. I have NOTHING in for food. My fridge is empty and so are my cupboards. I bought enough chicken thighs and buns to get me through until my settlement money arrives. But now there is a delay with that (not my lawyers fault - a docusign I was suppose to sign got lost in my emails). So it's noones fault (except my own) that this money is now delayed. I finally signed the document a few days ago but it will take a week or so to finally land into my account.
This leaves me with $12 in my account and no food. Even when I get paid all that money ($851.51) goes directly to rent, internet and cell phone leaving NOTHING left over for food. I have always worked on the pyramid of budget. I make a pyramid and nothing gets paid until that pyramid is paid. First rent,... then internet,... then cell phone,... then apartment rental insurance,... and then and only then do I buy food. After being homeless (twice in my lifetime) you learn to budget well. And rent is the first thing to get paid before anything else. So I'm a little concerned about having no food. $12 is not even going to buy me cereal and milk. So, roll on settlement money ~ I'm getting a bit hungry.
I did my taxes finally yesterday. I usually try and do them myself but I was confused this year as I had received those "non-earner benefit payments" which I coudln't figure out where to put in to my taxes. So in the end I just left them out and didn't claim it. I never got anything in the form of a t4 -type slip so I don't think I need to. I finally asked someone and they confirmed those payments are non-taxable. But I am still concerned I didnt' claim them anywhere on my taxes. I can't help feeling like this is going to come back to haunt me. But in the meantime, they are done. So now I can apply for that national disability that has come out. I tried filling out the form yesterday but I need to get into my government taxes account and guess what?? Locked out becasue of wrong verification phone number!! here we go again. So i can't do anything until I can get back into this account and at this point I dont even know how to do that. It's always something with me leaving me with the run-around. WHY can't things just go smoothly once in awhile???
So,... here I sit waiting for my microwave that as yet has no password to receive :} My anxiety is already starting. I won't realx now until I receive that email from Amazon with that code. Just another lovely sympton of my mental illness.
My friend Trish (who has stood by me through everything and is still around!) has asked me to do something. And that is to find one thing everyday that I am grateful for. And today I am grateful for air conditioning. That sounds a bit silly but Ontario has been hit with a heat wave this week. And Ontario heat is different than BC heat. Ontario heat is HUMID. You have a shower and go outside and want to come right back in for another shower,... but I have been blessed with Air Conditioning!!! I didn't have this 4 years ago. It was just installed in this building about 3 years ago and I have appreciated it and been grateful for it ever since. And this morning on the news we have been issued with a 'heat warning'. And with that I am extremely grateful for having a home to go to and escape the heat. I will always be grateful for air-conditiong.
So there you go Trish,... I know we talked about me ending this blog and starting a brand new one about gratity. But to be honest I can't figure out a new blog. I just keep getting frustrated setting it up and quit. So I will just continue on with this one instead.
And with that I am off to shower ~ because I have a home and a shower now. Something I will always be grateful for now.
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