Living in my Black Fog

Navigating life with a mental illness

Friday, June 6, 2025

 I give up

Posted by My Black Fog at 12:39 PM
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About Me

My photo
My Black Fog
Fergus, Ontario, Canada
I am a 62 year old woman who suffers from a mental illness and recovering from a drug addiction. On the outside I am 'normal' Look just like every other face in the crowd. But inside? My heads swirling,... I have been diagnosed with severe chronic depression. I have been for all of my adult life. But it seems to get worse with each passing year. And the past two have been brutal. I have isolated. Retreated into my own existence. I am living completely in "My Black Fog"This blog, twitter & Facebook are my 'other' (secret) identity & a great outlet for me. Have found so many new friends with mental illness who understand & don't judge.
View my complete profile

Things I've Been Diagnosed With

These are the diagnosis that I have been given over the past 30 years. I have never even heard of some of them and the others are very common. Doctors now cannot believe I have been diagnosed with some of these????

Anorexic as a teen

Depressive neurosis (dysthymia)

Rapid Cycling Bipolar Disorder

Cluster B Personality Disorder

Situational Adjustment reaction-Anxiety

Post Partum depression

Fibromyalgia ~ (isn't a mental illness but a lot of people in
society feel its "all in my head" and don't think of it as a 'real' disease)

Adjustment Disorder with depressed mood

OCD

agoraphobia







Famous People with Bipolar

Jim Carrey

Robert Downey Jr

Patty Duke

Carrie Fisher

Linda Hamilton

Margot Kidder

Kristy McNichols

Ben Stiller

Robin Williams

Kurt Cobain

Stephen Fry

Sinead O'Connor

Ozzy Osbourne

Sheryl Crow

Axl Rose



Most of these people were fully functioning members of society. All thoroughly gifted and talented in what they did.



There is always HOPE for us!!!!!!







My Blog List

  • bipolar.and.me
    7 years ago
  • Sugar Filled Emotions
    8 years ago
  • Ask A Bipolar
    9 years ago
  • Living in Pleasantville
    9 years ago
  • Ramblings of a Mad Woman
    10 years ago
  • The Mass Defective
    10 years ago
  • My (not-so-private) Diary of an Eating Disorder.
    10 years ago
  • Ghost Girl
    11 years ago
  • BPD in OKC
    11 years ago
  • 'My Head Noise' -La Reve blog
    12 years ago
  • Swirls in my head - Thoughts from a mental mind
    12 years ago
  • Steph on the Borderline
    12 years ago
  • Bowling With Borderline Lil
    13 years ago
  • Bippidee
    14 years ago
  • A Borderline Journey
    14 years ago
  • BPD Awareness's Blog
    16 years ago
  • Nod If You Hear Me a Bipolar Blog
  • My Thirteenth Sad Day
  • Walking the Borderline
  • Blogger Not Otherwise Specified

My First Blog Award

My First Blog Award
"Life Is Good"

Followers

Blog Archive

  • ▼  2025 (434)
    • ►  October (9)
    • ►  September (37)
    • ►  August (41)
    • ►  July (29)
    • ▼  June (69)
      • Trying to make a fresh start
      • Getting new stuff for my apartment
      • Getting back to everyday life again
      • It finally came,...
      • Theres living a life you enjoyand then theres livi...
      • No money again today
      • I am not feeling any better today than I was yeste...
      • Not spending one more holiday alone
      •  I am aMentally Ill Monsterand I just need to DIE now
      • Today I call MAiD
      • I got my microwave
      • Look what came back?
      • Sunday morning is Skote Outdoors
      • When you’ve been homeless ~ this is paradise
      • Waking up with a smile of gratitude
      • Thank You Football,...
      • All I ever wanted was PEACE and to be left alone t...
      • I guess Best Buy Canada needs my $529.11 much more...
      • I haven't written yet today. My heart just isn't i...
      • All because I don't have a doctor
      • These people suck the hope right out of you
      • This is a long one ~ but the last time I speak abo...
      • Day One of a fresh start
      • I have learned
      • The whole world hates me right now
      • I have a home!
      • Maybe shes right,... maybe nobody does like me
      • My last week ~ Most difficult week of my life
      • I give upLiving is for familyIf your family thinks...
      • No reason to live now
      • I give up
      • This is my life now.I was angry and I needed to ge...
      •  I am just angry nowReally fucking angry at Dianne...
      • Can't even almost afford rent ~ time to give up an...
      • I am just about to check out of the Royal Inn. Kir...
      • Well it has been a day!
      • My situation is so fluid it is changing hourly
      • I need to get back to Ontario
      • Not ONE fucking person can help
      • Everything is all gone
      •  Its 1:30 in the afternoon. I have given up. I am ...
      • Just let me go - I will NEVER go to a shelter
      • I need "MY OWN PLACE" to be
      • I have lost 14 lbs in 2 weeks. Welcome to homeless...
      • One more day before I have to decide. Stay or exit?
      • Please someone - help me find a home
      • Completely broke ~ but still happy
      • I have bought myself 2 more nights
      • Mental illness has ruined my life
      • I literally have to find faith
      •  I give up
      • The mentally ill monster noone wanted
      • I hate dianne mattin for ruining my fucking life
      • It's all a big shit show now ~ Time to go
      • If only I could turn back time ~ it hasn't even be...
      • Who am I trying to kid
      • It.s been confirmed ~ the property is a sinking ship
      • I'm sorry but I have to get this off my chest
      • Now I'm panicking
      • I've run out of money
      • This proves money doesn't buy happiness
      • Meeting so many cool people
      • Homeless ~ yet happy
      • A few of the views I get to appreciate
      • It has been a roller coaster ride!!
      • Now the REAL story comes out,...
      • found the fentanyl
      • I just need to die now
      •  I only have the clothes on my back to wear. I was...
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