I've run out of money

I knew this day would come. I just didn't think it would come this fast. I have run completely out of money. I have one more night here at the Croft Inn and then I will be 'on the streets' homeless once again. So I have to admit that as happy as I still am,... this morning I am also very concerned. I can only afford to live inside one more day and then it's back to living outside. I'm too old for living outside. 

The woman running the motel hasn'tsaid anything more about the cleaning job either. To say I am concerned is an understatement ~ right nowI am terrified.

Last night I stayed up late organizing all my belongings. After living out of suitcases for so long everything got tossed around. The small carry on luggage was proactically ruined. All of my toiletries were in it when I had to carry it all over town when I was homeless. All the bumping and jiggling casued lids to come off and when I opened the case it was a huge mess of liquids, creams and baby powder all spilled everywhere. It was a disaster. Ittook me about half an hour to clean that up. Now it's ready for more stuff as it looks like I will be homeless and carrying it around town once again.

I am terrified ~ I am tired of being homeless. I want my own space. But with no money,.. I am fucked.

I still love BC,... but what is going to happen if I continue to be homeless??? At my age I will not be able to cope.

So thismorning I have woken up scared. Because I realize this nice set up here at Croft Inn is coming to an end.

I put up notices on bulletin boards around town. I have put up posts in thelocal community pages on Facebook but so far I haven't even gotten a nibble. So this morning I am realizing ~ it's back to the streets for me. 

Having no money has left me with no choices but living on the street.

Something better come through for me becasue I willNOT be living on the street ONE MORE DAY. I WILL resort to Fentanyl if that happens. I want to live,... I want to live here,... I want a life,... but society seems hell bent on keeping me from having one.

I want to live,.... I want to live,... I want to live,....

But i will notlive homemless onemore day.

Money may not be the be all = end all to me. But right now I really wish I had some.

I am too old to be homeless