No reason to live now

I don't know what to think,... I tried,... I try so hard with Hayley but nothing I do is right. She is now gone out of my life for good. I will not be a burden to anyone. Even my children.

Putting her text in here even though it will piss her off even more. But I don't understand it,... I dont' know how she can feel this way,... but she does. I feel like we are in two completely different relationships. I feel NONE of what she does. She has not been in my life for YEARS,... so how the hell have I ruined it so much. Remember,... I took her in when SHE HAD NOONE,... but I don't get the same respect.

As far as my children and family are concerned. I did this myself and I can get myself out of it.

I give up. I just can't do right by anyone or anything.

I really dont understand how she feels this way????????????????

 

For the record I have never blamed her for not taking me in (my last post says I know she cant as shes not in a position too). I have never blamed her for not giving me money. I NEVER ASKED and never would. I know she doesn't have it. So where is all this coming from???? I cant fucking win