Canada doesn't want me so time to DIE!

I have totally given up finding a place to live. For two years now I have been trying to leave this building. But I think two years of looking is enough to tell me there is no place to rent in all of Canada in my budget.

I have been priced right out of living

So now, what do I do? I refuse to live here. Yesterday I went out to the gazebo. There were about 5 or 6 people out there. When I went out - they all left. They all got up and left,... all because of Darren Green. These people are new ~ people I barely even know. The only reason I am disliked is because Darren Green met them before I did and tarnished my reputation. Before they even got to know me - I was hated. That was the last time I get embarrassed like that again. It made me feel like I smelled. I walk up to the gazebo and noses wrinkle and everyone gets up and leaves. 

Now this is not a big deal if it happens only once in awhile. But I get this every time I leave my unit. Between Arseen, Tonya, Darren, Mark,... (just a few) they enjoy making my life a misery. I am their entertainment.

A person can only take this so much before they are severely effected mentally. How would you feel if everywhere you went people got up and left. I have never even met these people. They hate because they have been told to,....

Why am I hated so much? What did I do? I am so confused as to why I am such a hated unwanted soul. My family,... my old friends,... all gone. 

I am mentally ill monster that the world hates

And because of this my mental health has severely declined and now I am just out and out suicidal. All I want now is to die. I can't take one more 'here comes Jaacquie - time to leave" it's so hurtful. And after two years of it I refuse to let them effect me anymore.

But how to die? Hanging? Slice my corotid artery in my neck? Jump into the gorge? Wait until I get to BC and just take a fatal overdose?? Whatever method I use,...

I plan to be dead and buried by September never seeing my 63rd birthday.

I just can't take the hate anymore,....

I just can't take life anymore,.....

I am heartbroken that it is going to end this way,...

But whatever happens,... I just need to be dead.

And all because Ontario Housing refuses to help me get an emeerfency transfer out of here. All this could go away if only S**** M***** just took her head out of the sand and SAW ME! HEARD me! Helped me,... but she didn't. Rules are not meant to be broken - even if I am being tormented. I have to be 'domestically violated' before they will help.

So S**** now I die and YOU could have saved me,.... sleep on that