I have got to get the hell out of this place!

Yesterday was a beautiful day. The sun was shining, it was hot out,... It was one of the first great days of spring. So I decided to take advantage of this weather and finally go back out to the gazebo to smoke a joint. I hadn't been out there for ages due to "Stay out of the fucking gazebo or else!" fiasco from Mark. But today I didn't care. I held my head high and marched right on out to the gazebo and had my joint. Mark and Darren were not at all pleased and shot me the dirtiest of looks and then got up and left. They think they are punishing me by getting up and leaving when in reality they are just giving me their chair so I don't have to stand. I still giggle when they do this. The real reason they get up and leave is Darren is terrified I will tell everyone out loud what he did to his cat. He doesn't want anyone to know that so he made up lies about me to get everyone to hate me. Didn't work. Two years later only him and Mark hate me. Noone else joined in. I thought they had but after going out a few times I was told they had no idea why I stopped coming out to the gazebo. When I told them Mark threatened me to stay out they were shocked. They had no part in that even though Mark told me they all hated me. WRONG 

And yesterday proved it. I sat out there twice and had many people sit and chat with me. Mark you are a fucking liar. And all day him and Darren had to stand outside elsewhere to smoke.

But this is exactly why I need to leave. I am 63 and suppose to be retired ~ enjoying life. Instead I am having to live a life walking on egg shells because of the bored gargoyles who do nothing but gossip and interfere in others lives. This place is a cesspool of bored folk hurting others just to pass the time. AND I AM DONE WITH IT ALL!

My apartment is completely packed now with only essentials out. I am that desperate to get the hell out of here. I don't even have a place to go. But I am so unhappy living here I have compleltely packed up what little life I have into boxes and I wait to leave. 

I have wasted ten years of my life here. 

Now it's time to get the hell out before I literally lose my mind or end my life,... and if I have to end my life to escape I will. I don't want to. I really don't,... but I will if I am forced to stay here. I have never been so miserable as the years I have spent in this building.

I need to get the hell out of this building!!!!! But how?