I hate this town!!!!!

Well I'm glad noone will be reading this entry,... I am fuming and just going to vent,...

I STILL can't get to Service Ontario. The weather has been so cold that schools and government offices have been closed. We have had snow almost every single day for the past month. And we are in the middle of a polar vortex that has left us in temperatures that are below twenty down to minus fifty!!! 

But today was sunny and I showered early so I called a taxi to get to service ontario to get my OHIP re-activated. My blood pressure is getting worse which is leaving me anxious to get on medication as soon as I can.  I REALLY NEED to get my OHIP! But the taxi was going to be an hours wait. I didn't like that but I had to go. So I waited,... and waited,... but waiting isn't easy when you live on the 3rd floor and can't see the parking lot or when the taxi arrives. I have to leave my unit to go out into the hall to watch out the hall window. It would be so much easier if they just gave us a lobby feed of the cctv like every other apartment building in this province. So waiting for me ~ who already has anxiety ~ is going back and forth from my unit to the hall window,... pacing,... waiting,... So you can imagine how angry I got when i was looking out the window and saw it pull up and then SOMEONE ELSE get into it and they leave. I know the girl who stole it. I had just been talking to her. She is the one that annoys everyone by asking for money all the time. I knew she was going out but was looking for a ride. She told me this while I had already called for my taxi. I TOLD her I was waiting for a taxi,... so for her to know I was waiting and then steal it when it came,... My heart sank. I had been waiting already for 45 minutes. Jen didn't even phone for one. So,... I took off my coat and cancelled my taxi telling them they let someone steal it,... and decided I'm not going today. 

I knew that even if the taxi came and I got a ride to Service Ontario, when i was done re-activating my OHIP I would have had to wait at least another hour for a taxi to get home. I'm a tough Canadian girl but it's minus 11 out there today and I just dont' want to get stuck having to walk all the way home in this icy cold weather. I've done it before many times but I am just not up to that today. I am feeling my age and I just couldn't do it.

When the fuck am I ever going to get the hell out of this apartment and get to Service Ontario???????? The weather isn't calling for any warmth soon. We are expecting MORE snow and cold! And what kind of town has NO buses and ONE taxi??? I HATE this town. I am not going to survive unless I get the fuck out of Fergus Ontario,... 

I AM DYING AND THIS TOWN JUST DOENS'T SEEM TO HAVE THE RESOURCES I NEED TO FIX MY HYPERTENSION

So unless I can get the fuck out of Fergus (and I doubt I can) then I will die of a heart attack or end up in a long term facility after a stroke. THAT is my future living in Wellington County here in Fergus,...

I need to get the fuck out of here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And just the feeling that I am so alone that noone can help me is devastating,....

I feel like I'm not even part of thsi society,....

I have never felt so alone,...