I really do give up

 I am so sorry I even started this stupid personal injury case. It has done nothing but make me fill out LOOOOOOOONG detailed forms and do assessments. And now they want me to do another one before I can even do this psycological appointment.

I can't even get out of bed,... I can't even take care of myself and they want me to fill out yet another form for yet another assessment for yet another appointment. 

They obviously are not understanding the level of despondancy I feel right now or how close I am to suicide.

Because so far my experience with this law firm has been to fill out forms and have assessements just to get an appointment. It's been 3 months since the accident and I have gone from bad to worse to SUICIDAL and can't get out of bed. 

But all they want are assessements and forms filled out.

So I called them today and basically told them I'm not capable of doing all these things for them. I let them know if that is what is required of me,... then I can't continue on with this case. I cannot pretend to be well and get out of bed and suddently be well enough to go into Mississauga to get this damn thing done. So we're at a stalemate. Either I do these things or the case can't proceed,... so I guess the case can't proceed anymore,...

I can't even get out to get groceries!!!!!!!!! i really don't care about forms. I'm hungry!

So as far as I'm concerned they can keep all of their assessments. They haven't given me any help yet and it's been 3 months!!!!!!  And I see they have charged the assessors already and my case so far is billed up around $10,000.00. That is nearly a YEARS WAGE to me. A YEARS! and still no help has come,... I am still floundering trying to do the basics like get food.

So what they have planned for me isn't even going to get me the help I need in the end anyway. I need caregiveres.  They haven't even offered me this solution,... Just more forms to fill out today just in order to HAVE the assessment for psychiatry. 

If I could do all these things,... I would. But I can't,...  I am physically and mentally unable to. So I have given up once again and gone back to bed and I guess this case is now over.

This is just fate to me that I need to continue on with FENTENYL.

I will never get the caregivers I need,.... never,... so I will never be able to fully look after myself ever again.

And this case seems to have just been a fucking waste of time and alot of fucking money has been billed so far and I didn't even get what I needed. 

So back to looking for fentenyl,.... lot less hopes to jump through and I get what I need ~ peace.