Thursday, June 9, 2011

Just can't pull myself together

Last night I was so upset and couldn't calm down. So I took double my Seroquel dose (400mg) one lorazapam and then a glass of red wine. It definitely helped my body to relax. But problem with that is I went to bed early (9'ish) but because of the seroquel I didn't wake up until early this afternoon. I'm still feeling groggy and drugged 2 hours later.
But at least I'm not feeling so overwhelmed and full of anxiety that I was last night. Right now I feel quite flat. Blah,... unemotional. Probably the seroquel hangover.
But I know once that wears off I will be back to those awful feelings of self-harm and self-loathing thoughts. I'm in a bad place right now.
I wished I could just be normal. ~ sigh ~ 

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